Broody

Yes. I am going to go ahead and admit it. I'm broody. I see pictures of my friends kids and I find that I am jealous. I too want a small bundle of joy & frustration that I can share with the world. When will it be my turn? When will I have the chance to proudly show off the latest antics of my uber-adorable child?
I'm hoping that this year is the year that I get that chance. After all that biological clock that I've been steadfastly ignoring for the last decade is ticking more loudly than ever now.

Turning 40

Turning 40 feels just like turning 30.

I'm a year older and wiser. Or so they say. I will admit that I am older. To say I'm wiser would be presumptuous.

I am looking forward to being 40. I've often wondered what all the fuss is about. So far it's been great. I've been spoiled by my husband and my friends. Anyone would love that.

And then I was in the car this morning on the way to the rail station (I'm a commuter now!) and turned on the radio in an attempt to get a Rihanna song out of my head (it didn't work, the phrase 'chains and whips excite me' is still in there...) and caught the tail end of With or Without You. I loved that song when it first aired on the radio and I still love now. In fact that album was on of my favorites. Then the dj had to announce that the song came out 24 years ago! 24 YEARS???? It can't have been that long! Can it? It's not possible because I'm only...oh wait, that's right. I'm 40.

That's when reality sunk in and I finally gave in to the fact that I am indeed no longer in my 20s or 30s. But I refuse to accept that I am old. Old is a term reserved for bread that's been sitting out past it's sell by date. Old is a tree that has been around since dinosaurs walked the earth. 40 is by no means old. I will never be old. I may age (and I hope gracefully) and I may even wrinkle a bit (genetics prevent me from being wrinkled now) but I will NEVER be old.

So for those people who think that 40 is old, I say pphhhllppptttt!!!!! This spring chicken has some life left and I plan on enjoying it.

A good cry

Sometimes you just need a good cry. The kind of cry that you do when you're alone and no one can hear you. It's cleansing. It's freeing. And it puts life back into perspective. I had one of those today and it's been a while. I feel much better now, lighter. I feel like I can go on and face whatever is next.

There really is nothing like a good cry.

Are you pregnant?

No I'm not.

Why does that have to be the first question someone asks when you're having a bit of a moan about something that bugs you? No I'm not pregnant, I'm just irritated. Is that ok with you? What if I had said yes? Would that then explain everything? Would you then knowingly nod and say 'Ah yes, that must be it...'. Perhaps the next time someone asks me that question, I will answer yes just to see what the response will be. 

And on that note...what is people's obsession with wanting to know when I am going to pro-create? Is it not enough that I got married at all? Must I now submit to the age-old tradition of squeezing a small Winston Churchill-like being out of my womb? Don't get me wrong. I want small humans. But in my own time. When I'm good and ready. And if for some reason my timer goes off before having spawned, then so be it. There are always other options. Always. 

I was never one of those women who listened to her biological clock ticking away, fretting over not having a bun in the oven before time runs out. My attitude has always been if it's meant to be, it will happen. But I get so tired of explaining this to people over and over. Most people don't understand my attitude. They assume, you're married now, why don't you have children??? I ask only one thing. Leave me to do things in my own time and don't make me feel guilty for not having added my two cents to the human race.

Thank you.

Family

Family...what does it mean?

The subject of family has come up a few times this week and it makes me wonder. What do we really consider family? The term appears to be different for everyone. Some consider family to be those people that are related to you by blood and others believe that it's those people closest to you.

I will tell you what I believe. I believe that family is the circle of people that surround you and will do anything for you. Some you choose, others you don't. Some are blood relations, some are not. Regardless, they are your family for the long haul. What's important is how those people make you feel. Family should make you feel loved and protected because that is what family does.

Most importantly, family does not stab each other in the back or deliberately cause problems for each other. Family respects each other.

This is what family means.

Almost Famous

Not to sound like I'm tooting my own horn but I do have to say that I am a little proud of being featured in the company newsletter this week (picture and all!) speaking to the CEO of our Department (that's globally). Yep, working at IBM feels pretty good. :-)

Here is the link to the article.

Well endowed...

There is nothing like moving to another country to make you feel well endowed. Apparently here in the UK, I am a cup size larger than in the US.
No wonder my husband thinks I have big boobs!